Friday, July 30, 2010

More and Less

I've been thinking about my goals. It's 26 days until the local schools start. Whether I have a full time job or not, there are changes I want to make in myself. I made a short "more" and "less" list. What would be on your more and less list?

*Bible reading (I've gotten away from my daily reading, any reading for that matter. I started out the summer well...)
*sleep (I've been staying up later and later to watch t.v. It's spending time with my husband, but it's not always quality time. I'm still getting up at the same time and I'm tired.)
*planning ahead (often I don't put things on the calendar until the last minute. It would make things a lot easier if I put them on, give them thought ahead of time. Since deciding this, I put a few things on the calendar! :))
*scrapbooking (it sounds like a frivolous hobby, but I want our children and their children to be able to have stories and memories to share about us. I like capturing moments of time surrounding our girls who are growing too fast.)
*card/letter writing (letting those who are far away know I think of them, they are cared about)

*facebook/email/computer checking (lately, with summer vacation, the computer is in reach all the time. I check things far too frequently... often to find there isn't new information/emails/updates...)
*television (there are too many shows I watch that I don't need to...)
*eating out or throwing an unhealthy meal together (this could have been a more meal/menu planning and grocery shopping ahead...)
*less snacking, especially during the aforementioned tv time
*worrying (I mention it all the time, I am a worrier... it hasn't gotten me any closer to my goals...)

These are often on my lists... some for Lent, New Year's resolutions... but never on daily goal lists. I have run marathons-I set goals and I have achieved them. What's different about these goals? I don't make it a choice each and every day... I have my lists. I saw on an organizing website that you needed to post your goals so you would see them and think of them more often. I like the idea. :)

Hope all is well on this sunny Friday (well, it's sunny, here. It hasn't rained for days and isn't supposed to for the next week!)

Thursday, July 29, 2010


Hello, Readers. It's been a little while, again. Much going on, but at the same time, little...

My vegetable garden has not been fairing too well-too much sun and too many critters eating them-insects and mammals.

Our oldest daughter was set to get her driving temps last week. We went, she took the computarized test, she passed and onto the paperwork. We took everything in, but her birth certificate didn't specifically list her gender so it was unacceptable. We went back early this week with the only other copy we had and it didn't have the state's health department seal, so we have to go through a process to get a new copy mailed to us and take it back... She was sad. She was so looking forward to driving.

Our dog, the weimaraner, has become very skinny-losing a lot of weight. We took him to a vet who did blood tests, and the tests came back good-especially for a 10 year old big dog. Still, we wondered why the lack of interest in food and great loss of weight-he'd lost 14 pounds! We took him back on Tuesday and they sedated him to check his teeth, did some scans and swabs. We should know more tomorrow or Monday as to the results of those. It was rather strange around here without him on Tuesday. He came home groggy and stumbling around-very clingy after his visit. I dropped him off at 7am and he wasn't seen to until 2 or so-so he was hungry since he hadn't eaten since 7pm the night before, stuck in a kennel which he doesn't like and away from his family. He was a sad dog. He sure was happy to see us when we arrived to get him, though.

My husband hasn't been running much since my last post. He had fallen off a jet ski and bruised a rib, so that's taken a bit of the wind out of the sails. I'm still working on training for the half marathon, either way. Just will work out better for me, I think. I did 7 miles last weekend, again.

I have attempted digital scrapbooking since I posted last. I have a lot of work to do before I will be happy with a layout. Strange, how I was feeling good about paper and hands-on and now I feel new and uncertain. I am unsure of what to write and what to document first.

That isn't the only are of my life where I am uncertain. Still no word on a job for the fall and the pool is nearly dry of opportunities. Hopefully we'll see it pick up next week. I have heard jobs are scarce, it's not just me, but it's hard not to let it eat away at your self confidence. Someone important in my life says I need to find a new passion, something other than teaching since it's not looking good. I am wondering about this. Wouldn't it be hard just to pick up a new passion and set aside the old? I have heard from so many that I'm great at what I do-teaching, but that's in a substitute setting. Maybe it's just people being nice, saying what I want to hear... the little voice whispers these things to me. It's hard not to let it eat away at the faith that says God has a plan, He will guide me... where am I going? I feel nowhere... I'm trying to have hope. So many people have advice and opinions-just get a long term and that foot-in-the-door will get you there (I've had 4-5 long-term jobs, now...), just get into another district and that will help (done that, although my husband thinks not enough... but then what-how do I choose where to go? long-terms or daily jobs... one doesn't know.) It's difficult. The waiting and the worrying that I'm not good enough, that I'm stuck. Also, the not knowing what to do-get in a district where they know and like me well? Keep moving around so many know me and I will have opportunities? Just the politics and knowing the right people? Sigh...

I have felt tired, run down, lazy lately. It's affected my running and who I am, I think. I am beginning to wonder if it's this lack of confidence from the job... or the really hot weather? Am I just wilted? :) I have read several blogs, lately that have been balm to my soul-pictures and smiles in the words, too. :) This isn't the type of post I like to write-after all the title of the blog is positively mom-but sometimes it's just good to write about the things that are weighing on you. Although when I hit "publish post" I am filled with the sense of "you don't have it so bad! why are you posting that! many people have it much worse!"

Take care, blog readers. Things will perk up soon! :)

Tuesday, July 20, 2010


The running is still going about 4-5 days a week. Today was so nice. Some tired muscles, but no shin pain, so that was great! My "time" (I wear my garmin way too much and check her far too frequently on my runs...) was quicker than normal. I asked my husband over the weekend if he'd like to do the half-marathon. I would love to do it with him instead of the full alone. My body has felt too...injured this time around and I'm still so worried about injuring myself again. I enjoy the arduous training, the drained feeling from being worn out at the end of a double-digit milage run, but I worry. I'm a worrier naturally, so this area of my life is no different. My husband and I started this journey together, and he took the injury detour that year of my first marathon. He hasn't tackled it since. The marathon distance can be daunting. But we used to enjoy our runs together (at least that's how I remember five years ago. ;)) We'll see. I've been working on running for a few months, building up, but he's been working on getting started again-he's up to three miles without walking, so I'm pretty proud of him, hopeful and excited to have a partner in this journey.

I have been reading up on digital scrapping, but haven't tried anything yet. I'm a planner and I'm a bit intimidated as to where to start. So many albums to do, so many pictures and stories, but where to begin??

My girls seem to be growing up at the speed of light. Our oldest takes the written test for her temps on Friday. Then she will be able to start driving with us here and there. Our youngest has a writing camp this week with 6-8 graders. Strange to see her as a growing/preteen/middle schooler! :)

Hope all is going well for you this week! :)

Friday, July 16, 2010


It has been ages since I sat and typed up a post. I have thought many times over the last few weeks: I have to blog that! But, alas, I haven't gotten to it. We spent a little over a week out of town, driving the very long drive to Disney in Orlando. Then we spent 5 days there and headed back. It was a wonderful family vacation for the four of us. Although, I've felt lazy since we got home. No one to clean up after us and make our beds! :) We got a complimentary upgrade to a very fancy room. It was delightful, and I enjoyed being spoiled! :)

Running... I've been running. It's been an interesting process. I feel soreness, pain, fatigue... then I wonder what to push through (thus preparing me for a marathon!) and when to let my body/legs/immune system rest? Last year I pushed right into a broken leg, and I know I won't be winning any marathons, and sometimes I push myself so hard that I don't feel like myself (ie with patience) towards my family. I'm reading Run Like a Mother and it's very good. It's inspiring and I am enjoying it. I'm planning on reading Born to Run, as well, in the near future. I do enjoy reading about running. It makes me excited to lace up and get out there. I have had such sore shins, then when that seemed to finally lessen, my achilles hurt for a few days, as well as my calf muscle. Today I felt defeated when I ran only 7 of my suggested 10, but my stomach attacked around then and I stopped at home instead of continuing on for three more. It felt like the right decision at the time, but after I was kicking myself. I am training for the full marathon, but am wondering if the half is better for me, to get back to fun... I think I wonder this each time I begin marathon training and life gets in the way of me following the schedule exactly. But this year, I am wondering if my legs (and mind?) would enjoy doing a half or two before I get back to a full... I keep mulling it over-a mental game, a process... Keep running to get fit, for sure, but the rest will come. Oh, I did try a few portions of runs (half miles on four different occasions) barefoot and enjoyed it immensely! I stretched before and after and didn't seem to be in too much pain... no more than I had started the run with, anyway, with shoes on. That Barefoot Angie Bee has me really intrigued and inspired. :)

I've been researching digital scrapbooking. I'm often at my computer, and I love the ease of working with photos. I love the process of paper and creativity that scrapbooking brings, too, so I'm researching, learning, leaning towards a hybrid, possibly. I will keep you posted on how that works out.

It's been nice to be away from the worries of "a job or no job" for the fall. There haven't been any new openings posted. They usually open more up again, on Aug 1. We'll see... Until then, no worries... Which is easier said than done. I must keep praying. I have no idea what God has in store for me at this point.

I have so enjoyed reading blogs that I frequent. I try to comment, often, so the writers know I enjoy their musings, like, Isabelle, Momo, Juls, Kelly, Ali, Cathy and Thimbleanna, to name a few. I will try to post more, as well! :)

Hope your summer is going great! :)